NASA scientists and thousands of others are bewildered by the appearance of several bright, shiny spots on the surface of the asteroid Ceres, largest object in the asteroid belt, which the U.S. space program has been exploring in recent weeks.
Speculation has run rampant as to the nature and origin of these reflective spots.
Wonder no more, my friends. I am in the exclusive possession of a communique from the leaders of Ceres to us Earthlings that explains precisely what the spots consist of and the threat they pose to our national — nay, our global — security.
You can read it all at this link.
Don’t say you haven’t been warned.